Thursday, June 27, 2013

Our decisions and the ripples that can turn into tidle waves

I usually stay quiet these days when it comes to controversy. My opinions are just that, my opinions. I believe that this quote from Neale Donald Walsch would be valuable for anyone who has an opinion on what another person says, believes and does. "No one does anything inappropriate, given their model of the world." This may be the truest statement I've ever heard.

Yes, sometimes we realize we are doing something "wrong". In actuality, we are just making a new decision in our lives. This statement can be difficult to accept, especially if we're on the outside and someone has "wronged" us. But it is as it is. And we must decide whether or not to forgive and go on or to show favoritism to our feelings.

I am wrestling with this over the Paula Deen issue. I don't watch her show so I don't really care that she was let go and that her sponsors are scattering. But there are many more variables here than we imagine. Are Food Network and commercial interests just doing what will protect it or are they truly disgusted by Paula's attitude toward language that is not now, or ever, acceptable? Can they accept her apology and still stand by their decision? And what of Paula herself? Is she really sorry? Or is she afraid that her career is dead and her name will be poison? These are all valid questions and we cannot know the answers. We can only make "our" decision based on the evidence that we see.

I accept Paula Deen's apology. I don't take it any further than that. I accept it and I let go. I'd break bread with her and I wouldn't cast stones. But if I owned a network, I would also remove her from it.. I don't care if millions of young black men are using that word continuously. That doesn't make it acceptable. It is not an excuse to use the word. Personally, I believe it is the most volatile and offensive word in history. I would remove Paula as my way to say, "this is not acceptable and this is a way to show that." And I would just as freely show up with her in public for dinner and laugh and hug her. Seventy Time Seven my friends.

I used to say that I didn't believe the statement; "No man is an island." but I believe "every man (human) is an island." I now believe both statements are true. Each of us is an individual part of the whole. Like how all of the tiny cells make up our body. We need to nurture each cell as part of us. Individuals are part of the All. When we are sick, or find something cancerous in our bodies, we care for it so that we can make ourselves better. But we do not allow the cancer to spread. We are tender and at the same time firm. If we become angry about our sickness, it will create more sickness as the body is out of alignment with itself. If we create joy and happiness while seeing the sickness, we heal. Let us make a new decision with our thoughts and we will heal ourselves... and the world.

Michael Miller